Wait what?

So, Ginnifred just posted this and I like it, so I am also posting it.

( Photo-Ganza! )

HOLY CRAP GINNY IS COMING HOME IN LIKE 4 HOURS.

I suspect, that over the next couple of weeks, this journal will see much more activity then it is used to. Considering it is used to none, by the process of me typing right now, the activity of this journal has gone up exactly 100%.

So I was reading the only other two posts on here and surprisingly didn't want to vomit when I read them, so they can stay.

So yes, I did in fact get married. Which is the main reason this journal will see a sudden spike in activity over the coming weeks, not because I think you're all vastly interested in what a standard married couple does. Quite the opposite in fact. You see, Ginny left for China this morning.

Her school does this thing called Intersession, and during the month of January, instead of staying home for an extended break, the students at Washington and Jefferson return to campus and choose to either take a single class, or go on one of the school sponsored trips. Ginny has wanted to go on one of these trips since she first started going here, and this is the first year the school has offered a scholarship for students who are interested but may not necessarily have the means to do so. So this year, she got the highest scholarship offered for these trips, and we made up the difference, and she left this morning at 5:45 AM.

I can honestly say, that this is the first time in my entire life I have lived alone. I lived with my parents until we got married, and then moved directly in with her. It's interesting how ingrained in someone you can become in as short as six months. My mind works on a completely different schedule now then it did before. For example, as of the time I'm writing this, (9:23 PM) my brain is telling me that we are currently in prime TV/Board Game/Talking/Cuddling time with Ginny, however, as there is no one here but me, I am sitting in the dark, at my computer, typing to no one.

This startles me. I knew I would be kind of lonely when Ginny was gone, but I was unaware that I have never had to function on my own. Don't get me wrong, I can take care of myself, I'm perfectly proficient at cooking and cleaning, getting up on time and going to work, taking care of our apartment (aside from both fish that I have consequently killed) and more or less functioning in the real world. What I'm referring to is the sense of aimlessness. When I was at home, I did what I wanted to do between helping my parents or brothers or going to work. Now, I spend the little free time I have online between helping Ginny cook or clean, or helping her by running errands, or talking to her, or doing just about everything with her at this point. This is where I'm currently falling apart.

I have no one to come by my desk and see whats going on, and randomly strike up a conversation, there is no one to watch The Office or Weeds with and laugh and cry and cuddle up against right before bed. There is no one reminding me to take out the trash a dozen times, not that I necessarily need to be reminded that many times, but its something I've grown used to.

My question to you, no one who is reading this, is what does one do in this time he would normally be filling with his wife and best friend? I can only surf the internets for so long. I'm currently reorganizing the apartment in my head, and noting that I need to rebuild our media center PC tomorrow, but after that I'm at a loss. I feel like I need to work everyday all week just to cope with the absurd amount of down time I'm going to have without her here. I'm also going to be working on getting OSx86 to run on my main computer, which is proving less then fun. I suppose it will be alright to have that time be uninterrupted, but still, how long can I stare at a screen without my mind melting?

The irony in all of this, is we've had a couple of fights in the recent past about me not getting enough time to myself. I can tell you right now that I would gladly give any of my possessions and possibly limbs/organs if she'd come home. I have never, in my entire life, been so completely and helplessly bored and thus, miserable. I also find it startling that I have never once in my 21 years on this earth lived for only myself. Literally. When I was 13 I spent the next 4 years of my life living for cancer treatments, during this time, I met my now wife, whom I spend 98% of my time with now. So what do I do? I'm at a loss...

Tomorrow is driving to Washington Day. You should see how cram packed the hatch of my Jimmy is right now. I can't even see out of the rear windows anymore. Thank god for rear view mirrors. Not only did my brother the magician (not really) manage to fit all of the stuff into my car that I had brought from Ginny's, we also managed to fit the mattress, both of the rubbermaid containers of stuff, the cooler my mom bought us, and the things my aunt got us as well as all my clothes for the weekend, and the PS2. I watched him do it and I'm still not sure how he did it. I don't think the suspension on my car was this low even when we went to Bonnaroo last year.

The landlord is giving us the keys on Saturday. He said he has to fix the shower valve, and I'm pretty sure he mentioned something about the hot water heater as well. We're going to pick up our bed, and dishes, and probably a few other things from IKEA and target on Saturday after we get the keys. We are going to get the MALM bed I think, unless there is something there that we like otherwise. We also need to get the second Chinese lamp from target, and a table.

I'm going to get to cook for everyone on Saturday too! I'm excited for that, though I would rather make something besides the fajitas or enchiladas that everyone wants. It's kind of boring to me to make the same things I always make, but still, it will be fun to cook and share wine with my friends for what is probably one of, if not the last time we're all going to be together. It's strange to think that Joann and Kelly are going to be gone in less then a month. These people, who I've spent the last three years laughing, drinking, seeing and doing things with will no longer be an hour away. Some of the best times I have ever had have been shared with these people, as well as some of the most embarrassing, and I'm going to be sad to see them leave. Next year is going to be wonderful, but it won't be quite the same without Joann and Kelly there to hang around with. To waste entire Saturday afternoons hungover and watching the food network, while Joann dozes in the armchair, Kelly sits on the arm of the couch, and Ginny and I lay there. We don't even have to be saying anything, it's just the comfort and familiarity of these people that make it perfect in its own simple way. It also won't be quite the same on Friday nights, when drinks are poured and guitar hero is played, and I have no worthy opponent since Kelly is gone. I'm sure we'll see them again, I mean, their both in the wedding party, so they kind of have to be at the wedding, but the comforts of our little "family" are going to disappear after these next 4 days, and that makes me sad, sadder then I've been in a long time. (crying will inevitably ensue this weekend, I have no doubts of that.)

Otherwise, I suppose I can't complain. Though I'm pretty sure I have to drop my health insurance down to a lower tier, because I cannot survive on the amount of money I will have left this pay. Oh! Speaking of health insurance, I finally managed to get back to my doctors. Who were happy to tell me everything is clear, and within six months I will be granted a clean bill of health. After 5 long, nerve racking years, I will officially be a cancer survivor. I can't really describe what that feels like, but it's kind of like having a huge burden lifted from your mind. Regardless, I'm headed off. Adios.

Revoke, rescind, rewind, retract, in other words, BALETED!

I trashed my other LJ for various sundry reasons. Mostly it was complete crap, not that I have any expectations for this to be any better but I can give it a try I suppose.

So things, working, working, marriage (more on that later), working. For Best Buy none the less, I sell computers to the unwashed masses. It can be at times incredibly terrible, in fact, were it not for some of the people I work with, it would be utterly unbearable. Were people to know what actually happens after they leave a store like Best Buy, after bombarding their salesman with the most asinine, uneducated questions, they would be appalled. For the most part, unwashed masses, you are mocked, which you only bring upon yourselves. I apologize, well, kind of, but you do really sound quite dumb.

Anyways, the people I work with are for the most part decent humans. They make the day more bearable, and laugh at all the same stupid crap that people dish out. I'm going to have to leave there soon though, moving out of home, in with Ginny, down to Washington, new store perhaps, or perhaps a whole new job. Kind of sucks, I like the people I work with, and for the most part what I do, and I have health insurance again, which is nice. Eh, move on, move along, it happens. So anyways, the whole marriage thing.

Right, so I'm getting married, Ginny and I are getting married. We're moving the first batch of our things into the apartment on Saturday. I'm excited for it, it will be a new chapter of our lives, it will be a new adventure. The apartment is cute, it isn't huge, but its the right size for us, I wish I were staying there now, but the drive back to work would be a bit much, though I'm going to have to make it for a bit after the wedding until I can find something new, or get into a new store. So I'll be staying here till after the wedding, which is just a bit over 2 months away now, its exciting. June 30th is coming quick, we still need to take care of the counseling session or 2 we have left. The invites still need to go out, which will hopefully go this week.

Other things, um, thinks thinks thinks. I've been spending a lot of time watching the series I always mean to catch up on. Finally working through the new Dr. Who series. Just about half way through season 2. It's a lot better then I expected actually, I never cared for the originals, though I can't really pinpoint why, maybe just to young to care before. I should try and watch some of the old ones again. I'm working though Stargate SG-1 again, it's kind of shit scifi, but I have a thing for bad scifi.

It's kind of setting in that life is about to go through a major change. It's kind of weird to think about actually. It hit me this afternoon as I left for work that I'd not be coming home, well, this home anyways. We'll have out own, but its different to think it won't be this same room and same walls. It's also kind of refreshing. I need a change. I'm falling into mid-twenties malaise early. I'm in a comfortable rut. I'm barely scraping by money wise, but that's alright. I'm too comfortable, I need things to shake things up a bit, motivate me to do the things I know I can do but refuse to accept.

Speaking of which I need to start looking at culinary schools this summer. I will be great at that some day, and hopefully one of the schools in pittsburgh can get me to that day. Anyways, I've rambled on enough for the moment.  Adios.